Comedy Corner 8th May 2011

(The Corner formerly known as Joke of the Week.)  If you like corny one-liners a la Tim Vine, then you’ll probably like Tony Cowards.  Here’s an example of his stuff:

“My idea for self-adhesive wallpaper failed, I couldn’t get the backing.”

“My grandfather had an iron will, which was unusual as most people write theirs on paper.”

Boom, boom. There’s loads more on his Twitter page: TonyCowards if that’s whetted your appetite.  I have no connection to Tony by the way.  He hasn’t paid me a penny, and just to prove it, here’s a few more things that made me titter on Twitter this week:

BillyHarpin “Let’s be honest. Man U stand absolutely no chance against Barca unless Messi breaks his legs. Cue Paul Scholes …”

fleetstreetfox “I have no idea how to vote in the AV referendum. If only there were some minor celebrity on twitter who could explain it to me …”

And there’s two from thewritertype “If the royal wedding had been conducted on the AV system we would have seen much more of Pippa Middleton’s a**e.”

“Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. But at least serve a decent Chablis with it and show a bit of class.”

Ok, as promised on Tuesday too (as I’m sure hundreds of you remember the tweet and have come on here looking for it specially), it’s this from Lucy Porter (Twitter loonabimberton) on the hilarious BBC Radio4 Comedy Series ‘Act Your Age.’

“I love my huband.  (I don’t.)  My husband complained recently that I’ve been putting on weight.  I’ve explained to him that I have put on weight since I got married, because when I was single I used to come home, look in the fridge and go straight to bed … whereas now, I come home, look in the bed and go straight to the fridge!” Ooh, how good is that?

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