'Emmerdale-y' – 4th March 2012

(You can hear me talking Soaps 11.30-12.00 am every Thurs & from 4.05-5.00 pm Fri on Swindon 105.5 FM) CLICK HERE TO LISTEN

Ooh, we saw another side to Laurel and Ashley this week, didn’t we? “I thought Ashley said you were cleaning – not coming for a playdate,” Laurel sniped at Rachel when they came home to find her sitting helping Sandy.

Ashley was even more unpleasant to her, and then told her they couldn’t actually afford a cleaner. How come? They’re both working, live rent-free at the Vicarage (presumably), have got two young children and aren’t exactly big spenders, so you’d think a cleaner would be a perfectly justifiable expense, wouldn’t you?

Poor Sandy. I know he can be a bit of a rascal, but he’s getting old and they’re treating him like a child. I’m finding it quite uncomfortable viewing, as my own 83-year-old father’s recently been diagnosed with terminal cancer and is finding life more of a struggle every day now, and Sandy hit the nail on the head with the comment, “Old age is up with me,” when Rachel asked him what was up.

It was also sad to see poor Eric struggling at the B&B, and so painful to watch his excitment turn to despair as he and Amy realised she wasn’t coming. Ooh, she’s got a lot to answer for, that Val … Eric’s treatment of his 60th Birthday customers for a start. It was like the worst of all bad moments from a Fawlty Towers Episode.

You couldn’t blame the guy for complaining about his meal. It’s like ordering a curry and being given fish and chips. It might be nice, but it’s not what you ordered, and there’s no way anyone would behave like that in ‘real life’ – least of all Eric, as he’s far too much of a professional (and money-oriented), to upset a customer and risk losing all that income by shouting and throwing them out!

I was curious about this exchange though:

Eric: “This is a rare, organic lamb from just up the road. I even know its name.”

David: “It was Larry, wasn’t it?’

Amy: “It’s Lionel.”

Anyone over a certain age will know that David was referring to Larry the Lamb (the puppet), whereas anyone Amy’s age is unlikely to have heard of him and not realised David’s ‘joke’. Was that deliberate? I’d like to think so, as it was funny!

Wouldn’t it be nice to see a happy couple? We’ve barely seen Gennie and Nikhil since they got together (and they seemed to go from the first kiss to complacency in about five seconds flat), and now Paddy the vet messed things up with Rhona the vet when she was all set to propose. Will they sort it out, or is she going to be off?

It looked like Cameron was off, but – luckily – he only got as far as the pub, and before you could say “Mine’s a pint,” Chas had her hand on his arm and had given him a room. That’s fast work, love – even for you! I’m glad though, as I’ve said before that I thought they’d make a great couple.

They’re nearer in age for a start, and he and Charity have got great chemistry (which is so important), and it also leaves the door open for Andy and Debbie to get together. I think it could work, and hope the baby’s a match so that they can get to play happy families (well, as much as any Soap family ever can!), before too long.

Speaking of families: I have to admit that I’m a getting a bit bored with the Bartons and Adam’s chest-beating, “I’m’t man o’t ‘ouse now.” It’s all a bit much for me – and Holly. “Just cos you’ve played at running things for half a day doesn’t make you dad,” she told him, and she’s right.

Could he really just take on (what’s supposed to be), that big enterprise – almost single-handedly? Seems a bit of a stretch, so will this be the end for the Bartons? It feels as if they’ve run their course, but time will tell I guess, as it must be hard for the storyliners/writers to keep coming up with ideas – especially when a family unit changes like this?

As well as suggesting that Chas and Cameron would make a good couple, my gaydar also started beeping the second that rugby-playing van driver rolled into the village, and now it looks as if it’s going to be Aaron – and not Alicia (who really tried, bless her!), who’ll be scrumming-down (or whatever it is rugby players do), with Ed before very long. Aah. You never know when someone’s going to come along, do you? (That’s what I keep telling myself anyway!)

This week’s Paddy/Marlon/Rhona shenanigans were funny and very entertaining, but much of that was to do with the great acting/expressions on their faces and wouldn’t work on ‘paper’, but we’ve still got a few juicy morsels for my Grins of the Week:

Chas: “You’ve got loads going for you.”

Cameron: “Compared to a corpse that’s been put in a room and set fire to? Yeah.”

Ruby: “At least Bob’s not flirting with me? Last bloke I worked for was a nightmare.”

Bob: “What did he do? Put on a dress and call himself Shirley?”

Rodney: “Nice shirt.”

Paddy: “Shut up Rodney.”

Ashley: “It does look a complicated boat.”

Sandy: “Frigate.”

Rhona (to Paddy): “You are the wrongest vet in Wrongtown.”

Ashley: “I couldn’t help overhearing.” (that she was short of money)

Rachel: “What? Have you got a sermon about minding pennies?”

PS Where can I get one of those lovely jumpers Amy had on? (It’s not the first time she’s worn something that looks like it came from C&A (circa 1985)!

PPS  I wondered who it was that Alan was talking to in the Cafe, then realised it was David – who’d just had a shave!

PPPS Cain told Sarah that “Grandad Grumpy,” would still be there for her. Aah, bless!

PPPPS Notice how Megan delivers her bossy/bitchy lines then gives a massive big smile at the end? You watch. It’s like smacking someone in the face and them giving them a kiss – very cheeky, and a clever tactic!

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