Emmerdale-y – 7th October 2012

(You can hear me talking Soaps 10.45-11.15 am every Thursday, from 4.00-5.00 pm Fridays on Swindon 105.5 FM CLICK HERE TO LISTEN and on my internet Soap Show 6.00-6.30 every Wednesday on Tellyspy. CLICK HERE TO LISTEN)

Cameron’s a rabbit caught in the headlights; Jai gets caught out; PP’s out to trap David and Gennie’s got trapped wind!

The tension’s tightening by the moment. Cameron’s looking more and more like a rabbit caught in the headlights by the day, and Carl’s looking like the farmer with the gun as he continues to turn the screws on both him and Chas.

WHAT a great twist for Dan to have taken the cashbox upstairs (wow, who’d have thought they’d be making so much money?). I’d read that the burglary was going to go wrong but that was a real surprise. Chas’s face said it all, and I think we all knew what she was thinking!

Carl’s turned into a right ‘Mr Nasty’, and nobody’s being spared from his badass comments. He even had a go at Ashley by asking him how Gobby was settling in at the pub, but Ashley shot back with, “Maybe if you spent more time with your own kids you’d be less bitter.”

“You had that coming,” Chas echoed the sentiment.

It’s not about the money, mo-ney, mo-ney

For all his current wickedness, I did have a moment of compassion for Carl when he almost broke down as he confessed to Chas that he still loved her. I’d said it wasn’t about the money, but if only he’d thought of a slightly more conventional way of trying to win her round (flowers; chocolates; bottles of vodka … you know the sort of thing), rather than blackmail, he might have had more success!

Cameron’s not far behind Carl in the ‘naughty boy’ stakes, and if Carl did tell Debbie about Chas then he’d be in an even worse situation than he already is because now that he’s sold his van he hasn’t even got a getaway vehicle!

‘Can’t do this’? You just did

After finding her feminine wiles weren’t working on David, Pointless Priya (sorry Fiona, I had to!) got in a strop and told him, “I can’t do this.” Can’t stand not getting your own way, more like. She then decided that the only way to snare him was to plan a getaway, so she booked it and suddenly they were off.

Ooh, this is a tricky one. David’s married to Jake’s mum; is telling him, ‘You’re the best’, yet is jetting off for a week of sun, sand and the rest of it with that strumpet and telling Eric, ‘I think she might be the one’.

Poor David’s not the brightest spark when it comes to women, and he clearly isn’t thinking with his head here. There’s going to be skin and hair flying all over the place when Alicia gets back and finds out what’s been going on, although that’ll be NOTHING compared to what’s going to happen to Jai when Charity finds out about Rachel.

Does Rishi need a man-to-man talk?

I don’t like violence so am going to cover my eyes for the scene when she finally gets her hands on him (she’ll be getting a bit of practice in on Cameron first – if Carl goes through with it), and it’s lucky that Rishi’s more of a lover than a fighter or Jai would have had even more to contend with.

“So how did she get pregnant?” Rishi asked him. Oh, Mr S. I hardly think you need a diagram! Rachel got pregnant in the same way that Gennie did (well, not on the office floor – or maybe she did?), and we had more lovely – and very funny – scenes from our favourite parents-to-be this week.

Gennie’s pregnant and Jai’s having kittens

Despite Jai having joked that they were going to enjoy a ‘thimbleful’ of wine together, Gennie compensated by eating Nikhil’s weight in stirfry. The resulting pain led her to believe that she was about to drop the baby, but turned out to drop nothing more than rather a lot of ‘hot air’.

Oh, Jai’s face when that lift door opened at the hospital was a picture. If he’d been pregnant he’d have had the baby there and then!

It’s lucky that Nikhil’s preoccupied and that Charity’s too busy pulling the legs off spiders at the moment (well, being horrible to Edna) to notice or the cat would well and truly be out of the bag by now, and he’s also lucky that Rishi’s agreed to keep his secret. Will this all come out during the 40th live week I wonder, or will that be a juicy titbit still to come?


Kids, aye? That Gobby’s gone and got her own way big time now, hasn’t she? Ooh, she should have been sent to her room for a month for lying about Marlon like that, NOT won the prize of being allowed to go and live with her dad. No wonder she’s such a brat!

 “Soft-soaping her isn’t the way to go about this,” Sandy commented. He’s right. What’s going to happen next time she can’t get her own way? It’ll be like another little PP in the village. There. Think on …

Quick. Let’s have our Grins of the Week to take our minds off it!

Laurel (about Gobby being sent home sick from school): “I doubt she’s dying, and if she is she’ll have to go straight to bed.”

Nikhil: “Do you want to push?”

Gennie: “Yes, you … out of a window.”

Jai: “I don’t complain about your wife to you.”

Jimmy: “If you worked with her you would.”

Nikhil: “You’ve got to breathe.”

Gennie: “Yes. If I didn’t breathe I would be dead, wouldn’t I?”

Robbie: “I’m starting to feel like you fancy me.”

David: “Yeah, yeah. That’ll be it (!)”

Cain (about Dan): “Trouble is, it’s not like I’m losing a sister, I’m gaining an idiot.”

Debbie: “That is a bit harsh.”

Cain: “On idiots, perhaps.”

Nikhil (on the phone to Gennie): “No, Gennie, I don’t think you’re fat.”


* Cameron must have nearly died when that guy turned up with the car – saying it was playing up!

Despite having tried leave Jacob with his dad – who ‘wasn’t around’ apparently (what does that mean?), David somehow managed to organise cover for both him and the shop pretty quickly, didn’t he? Anyone who can do that and pack to go on holiday all within an hour should be working for the Government, not selling groceries.

* Hey. I’ve been busy collecting interesting lines for my blog on the Sunday after the live episode. I’d had a theory as to who was going to die, but new clues are emerging all the time and I’m now 100% certain it can only be one of two people. No matter who it turns out to be though, I’ll show you the evidence after the event and we can look back and see what might have proved to have been a sneaky clue and what just turned out to be a good old red herring!


Got a comment on anything I’ve talked about this week? Tell me what YOU think in a comment below; tweet me before Wednesday afternoon or call in to ‘Jane’s Soapy Corner’ live on Tellyspy between 6.00-6.30 on Wednesday night so that I can put your points across to my listener on the show online!

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