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Dressing gowns; dressing downs; special offer wallpaper, paper and pens and someone’s back to school again.
Roy got the bedroom decorated (much to Hayley’s horror), but no amount of decorating can ‘paper over the cracks’, as Roy and Hayley drift further apart with each passing day. Roy had persuaded Hayley not to visit Jane in case it tired her out, but when they finally went to the hospital they discovered that she’d died the night before.
Roy might think he’s doing the best for Hayley, but he’s terribly misguided and acting purely in his own interests – no matter how he tries to rationalise it. He just wants to keep her for as long as possible, but once the cancer really kicks in it’ll be too late for her to put her wishes in place, and when he’s watching her in proper pain – dying before his eyes – there’s no way even HE would be able to advocate keeping her alive, so she’s right to be pushing for him to comply with her wishes.
That’s a while away yet though, and Hayley’s very much alive and kicking at the moment, but if anything was going to hasten her demise it would surely be the prospect of waking up to that new wallpaper every morning. Her face when she saw it was a picture.
Still, as someone who owns a matching red coat and dressing gown I’m sure she’ll cope! The look of shock on Roy’s face when he opened the cafe door to be confronted by that embroidery; it’s a wonder he didn’t end up having a funny turn of his own.
Faye’s hidden talent:
Grace turned her evil attention on Mary this week. Even though they were caught red-handed spraying Mary’s van, Faye STILL managed to convince Anna that it wasn’t her.
That girl ought to get her head down and study. With powers of persuasion like that she’s surely got a fantastic career ahead of her as a defence lawyer!
It was as painful to listen to Mary recount the memories of being bullied as a child as it was to see her being bullied by a child (Faye being the – mostly – unwilling cohort) this week. Anna hasn’t yet realised the extent of Grace’s evil, and tries to mollify Owen.
“I know you don’t like her, but she’s a little girl,” she rationalised.
“Yeah. So was Tracy Barlow once,” he shot back.
Partners in crime
He’s on to something there. If Faye’s destined for a legal career then Grace should set her sights on becoming a partner in Tracy’s shop. She’s certainly got the right skill set. Imagine those two behind the counter together. Be afraid. Be very afraid!
Amy is – of course – half of Tracy’s genes (she certainly looks like more her mother with every passing week!), and with Steve as a father it makes you wonder what lies ahead for her?
There were some hilarious scenes between Liz, Steve, Michelle and Lloyd this week as Steve announced that he was going to go to College.
Liz was under no illusions as to her son’s potential. “I’ll give it a week,” she proclaimed to Michelle and Lloyd.
“I’ll give it an hour,” Michelle retorted.
“It’ll be us three that’ll have to pick up the slack. It’s a good job you’ve got no staying power,” Liz continued.
“Blimey mother. You really are the wind beneath my wings,” Steve replied in astonishment.
Liz and Sean have got an eye for the gays
Todd’s revelations took the wind out of Eileen’s sails this week as he returned, jobless penniless, and with a lot of catching up (and making up) to do.
“So, what’s she like then; this girlfriend of Jason’s?” he asked his mum.
“She looks like a blow-up doll,” Eileen replied in her usual blunt fashion!
Methinks Sean’s antenna might be pointing at Todd (not a euphemism!), and it didn’t take him long to suss out that the stranger at the bar was ‘A friend of Dorothy’.
“Liz. My ‘Gaydar’ is never wrong. I had Sandi Toksvig pegged way before she came out,” he announced theatrically. (Oh, if only there’d been a clue, Sean (!).)
“Yeah. I was the same with Boy George,” Liz replied in excited agreement. Great stuff!
Sean’s been in the thick of it this week. I’m not sure that Agony Uncle is his forte though.
“For a year at least, everything with me and Jools was fine; great. Then he sort of started to get clingy,” Todd explained.
“See, I like it when they get clingy,” Sean replied; clearly baffled at how anyone wouldn’t enjoy that!
So many Grins of the Week for you that I couldn’t fit them all in. Classic Corrie:
Grace: “What did you have for lunch then?”
Mary: “I had a prawn … salad … sandwich.”
Grace: “Big, was it?”
Steve: “If they invented a time machine tomorrow, I wouldn’t go back to being twenty, cos what did I have then that I haven’t got now?”
Lloyd: “Hair?”
Todd: “Nice shirt.”
Sean: “Looks better off. … That’s a lie; it doesn’t.”
Steve: “Why do you find it hilarious that I want to grow as a person?”
Lloyd: “If you ask me, you’ve grown enough.”
Todd: “It’s not my fault there’s a recession on.”
Eileen: “Well how come Jason and I managed to get a job then?”
Todd: “I wonder that sometime, an’ all.”
Steve: “Shouldn’t there be three of you?”
Liz: “What?”
Steve: “Witches, cackling.”
Kylie: “Look, I know you’re still angry with me.”
Leanne: “Hmm. Nowt gets past you, does it?”
Steve: “I answer to no man.”
Michelle (angrily): “Steve?”
Steve: “Yes dear?”
Gail: “I write to Sarah-Lou at least once a fortnight. I break open the Basildon Bond and I’m away.”
Eileen: “I’ll bet she looks forward to your letters (!)”
Julie: “I had a friend who got married in a poncho.”
Carla (gobsmacked): ” … Well, I’ll bear that in mind, yeah.”
Gloria: “Is there something I should know?”
Gail: “We’ll be here all night.”
Michelle: “I see you more than I see Steve.”
Lloyd: “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
Hayley: “It took you nearly ten minutes to reverse into a parking space.”
Roy: “It would have been a lot easier if that other driver hadn’t kept shouting at me.”
“Hayley: “He was driving an ambulance. I think he was in a bit of a hurry.”
PS
* If seeing Steve announcing that he was going to College made a little part of you feel that you’d like to go back and do a bit of studying, then ‘Carpe Diem’: seize the day. Get out there and DO IT!
* Do you think Grace might be Curse-ty’s long-lost sister? She’s got the same evil stare!
* Hayley was folding socks and had one left over. She wanted to keep it, but Roy couldn’t see the point. “If it’s not one of a pair, what use is it?” he pointed out with typical ‘Roy logic’ and deep poignance.
* Jason’s got very clean nails for a builder!
* We learned the perfect way to get yourself a free coffee/drink etc this week:
Gloria (to Nick): “Aah. Treating your mum to her breakfast. That’s nice.”
Gail: “Actually, it’s MY treat.”
Gloria: “Ooh, thank you. Milky coffee please Roy!
* Great performance from the newly-divorced woman in the Bistro. It wouldn’t surprise me if we saw her again. Beth (and Craig) had that little cameo when she appeared as an ex of Steve’s – and look at her now.
I gave them a big thumbs-up that week. I’m doing the same for this lady. She’s got ‘Corrie regular’ written all over her. Remember: you heard it here first!”
* The winner of the brand new, sealed box set of Meerkat story books (courtesy of Comparethemarket.com) is @TeamNatalieGume. Congratulations!
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