Queen Vic Corner – 31st July 2011

eastenders logo“Jog on old lady,” Lola said to Roxy.  Oops.  It must be awful to think you’re a babe but then have some pretty young thing to say that to you.  I wouldn’t know.  I haven’t been a babe since I was in nappies, and I’ve never been jogging (except once, when I was walking down a very steep hill and the wind got up unexpectedly).

Lola’s a teenager, but Jean’s acting like (a soppy) one over Eddie.  He doesn’t look the sort to wear enormous silk boxers, but she took it upon herself to do his washing and (like his furniture that got burnt; there wasn’t much, was there?), but what did he do?  Shout at her.  Eddie: if you don’t want anyone to read your letters, don’t go leaving them lying about on the kitchen worktop. Just a suggestion …

It’ll be another ‘Deep, Dark Secret’ I presume, because – as usual – when a new member of a fairmilee rolls into town, there has to be weeks of convenient dialogue to piece their ‘backstory’ together.  These new Moons seem to just keep on coming though, don’t they?  Any more on the horizon?  I like the new one: Anthony.  He’s fit right in, as did Tyler, although I don’t like his short temper.  Having said that, I’d rather have him than Michael any day.  He’s getting more and more sinister by the minute.  I wish we didn’t have to have all these pantomime villains …

Would an EastEnd geezer like Eddie really say to Michael, “I love you son” though?

Cora, Rainie & Tanya - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' Soap ReviewBack at the love shack, Tanya’s smouldering with desire (but not for her husband), and Rainie’s got God.

Rainie: “Ma?”

Cora: “What?”

Rainie: “I love you.”

Cora: “Excuse me while I puke.”

What a lovely bond they have!  Cora: “I preferred it when you were a drug addict.”  Greg preferred it when it was just him and Tanya, but at the rate she’s going, I reckon Tanya would have invited the new Moons (sounds like a Band!) to move in if Mo hadn’t come up with a house for them.  They’ve certainly got plenty of furniture to go in it.  I’m not sure that Kat and Alfie will be too pleased when they get back and find that the contents of their rooms have moved down the road.

Tyler & Anthony - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' Soap ReviewOut of interest, what did the boys do with the contents of the wardrobes, drawers etc?  The rooms were completely stripped (in the time it took Jean to eat breakfast), and there was literally NOTHING left. Sorry; stretching the plotline way too far here E/E.

There’s NO WAY two lads could clear out a whole house in half an hour, and the least we could have seen was everything that had been inside the cupboards left strewn over the floor.  You might think I’m being a bit pedantic here.  Soaps walk a fine line between credibility and totally unrealistic fantasy.  Why would you include a blatantly ridiculous scenario like this?  It’s just not necessary.

What Soaps do so well – on the other hand – is finding family members who look related.  Tanya’s the spit of Cora.  It must be such a great job being in casting and finding people who look right and can act too!

Say what you like about Rainie’s past, but I’m hoping this transformation continues.  She was so sensitive in the way she tried to warn Lauren about Ryan; just the way you’d hope an Auntie would. Shame the week ended with Lauren ignoring her advice completely, but that’s teenagers for you, aye?

It’s also a shame (especially in the week we had the tragic death of Amy Winehouse), that we saw Phil UNsack Ryan for his drug dealing.  That whole drug thing with him and Rainie came and went, and if I’d been a young person looking at them now, I’d think how easy it was to just stop and for everything to suddenly be alright again.  Maybe they need one of the young characters to get hooked on drugs and actually die.  Might just help get the message across perhaps?

Mas & Zee - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' Soap ReviewMasood’s really got the whole waiter thing sussed, hasn’t he?  “I’ll bring the cake out after the mains,” he told one family.  Hey.  It’s lucky you explained that to them or they might have expected it before.  Here’s something else that wouldn’t happen in ‘Real Life’ either.  There’s no way that Mas and Zee would stand having a discussion like that in front of customers.  They could have at least haved moved a step away from the table before starting their domestic!

That Afia’s no better.  No matter what your problems are, you leave them at home, not air them in your Restaurant.  How dare she speak to Mas and (worse still), her husband, like that?  I can’t find out from Google how old her character’s meant to be, but it’s young, and I find it hard to believe that (particularly in her culture), she would speak to her elders in that way.  It’s worse how she speaks to Tamwar.  I still don’t ‘get’ how he managed to go from teenage geek to husband in less than a year!

Yusef - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' Soap ReviewMind you, with the creepy Doctor for a father, I’m not surprised Afia’s got such a scary personality, and bossing and manipulating her husband is probably just second nature to her.  She’ll have him on tablets next.

Wasn’t it awful how Yusef blamed Lola for knocking Zainab’s bag onto the floor?  It’s so horrible: having people tell lies about you.

I’m so glad I don’t live in a house with teenage girls and their hormones, you know, although I bet they’re tidier than my dad!  Greg’s last resort is to sell up, and he goes to see Walford’s newest cash cow (I mean that in a caring way), whose money certainly hasn’t improved her manners.

Janine (to Greg): “Who are you?  Oh, yes.  Tanya Branning’s rebound.”

PS Why does someone always need to stand behind blokes when they’re using a punchbag?  Why not just make one that goes flat up-against a wall?

PPS Jay’s white vest with lime green trim didn’t do him any favours.  It’s lucky he’s cute!




7 Responses to Queen Vic Corner – 31st July 2011

  1. Meela August 9, 2011 at 11:40 am #

    Eastenders has been such a laugh last night Tyler makes me laugh soo much!

    • Jane August 10, 2011 at 6:26 am #

      It was a good Ep, wasn’t it? I loved the Max/Jack row too. Some very funny writing there. Thanks for the comment.

  2. sam August 11, 2011 at 8:21 pm #

    t was a good Ep, wasn’t it? I loved the Max/Jack row too. Some very funny writing there. Thanks for th

    • Jane August 19, 2011 at 10:22 am #

      We need the laughs to break up the misery, don’t we!

  3. Debbie August 12, 2011 at 8:04 pm #

    Poor Jean she really was hung on that guy . Pat will be leaving the show so maybe this is how she will leave out with him .I think the Max and Tonya will come crashing down around them ..to hurt so many people in the process. I would give anything to have a pair of Pats Earrings when she decides to hang them up.I live in America and so hooked on EastEnders .

    • Jane August 19, 2011 at 10:26 am #

      Pat certainly has some amazing earrings! Yes, she might well go with him. They say ‘What goes around comes around’, so Tanya will think her health scare’s ‘punishment’, won’t she? I’m guessing she’ll recover though (hope so, I LOVE Tanya!). How wonderful that you can watch EE in the US. What an amazing world we live in.

  4. tibs December 16, 2011 at 8:48 pm #

    yh i noe pat is a leggend!!!!

    OMG! Whitney is amazin and zeinab is so gulable !!!
    Hhahahhaha! inabit ppls!!!

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