Peter and Carla got married

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Connor? Barlow? Little does she know, he’s just a cheating ‘ho’!

So. Peter and Carla got married …

It’s not Mrs Connor now, is it? It’s Mrs Barlow. No. It doesn’t suit her at all, but not to worry; she’ll be back to Connor again before too long, as before he’d even consumated the marriage Peter was already kissing someone else. That man doesn’t know when he’s well off (literally). Fool.

The venue looked gorgeous (as did Fiz), and that ‘do’ must have cost a fortune. Carla doesn’t know it yet, but she’s going to be paying for a lot more than the cost of that crate of champagne she necked!

It seems that I’m not alone in feeling that seeing her passed out drunk on the floor was both unlikely and out of character – even for a seasoned quaffer like Mrs Connor, as well as ‘completely unprofessional and unbecoming for a businesswoman of her standing’.

How much more realistic would it have been to have had her just go off and take an urgent work-related phone call? Far more believable, surely?

Ooh, ‘Awkward’, Michelle

Michelle’s words at the ceremony were a bit unfortunate: all about death and ‘The moment of their last parting’ etc. It was a heart wrenching moment to see Roy and Hayley reach for each other’s hands as they listened, but thankfully Peter and Carla’s ‘last parting’ will be a lot sooner than anyone’s expecting!

Rob had a great line in the Rovers: “You look a bit worried. Have you got another one lined up? He does like to marry two at a time,” he teased.

He seemed to have left it rather late to start making childcare arrangements too, but his face when Carla walked in to the Rovers had guilt written all over it. Blind Freddie would have known he was up to something, yet Carla (blinded by love, presumably?) didn’t clock Tina’s angst-ridden and Liz’s disapproving faces.

It hadn’t taken Liz long to work out what was happening under her nose, and her expressions over the last couple of weeks whenever she’s seen them together have been hilarious. Sally’s had me laughing this week too. She’s at her comedy best when she’s in full ‘Hyacinth Bouquet’ mode, and Tim rolling up with that van and – shock, horror – becoming a window cleaner have almost had her reaching for the smelling salts!

Loving Dev’s new fitness flop (sorry, routine!) storyline so far too (“I’m only doing it for the kids. If it wasn’t for them I’d be half man, half sofa,”). Very funny, and it was a great week all round for humour, with Beth on fine form and Rob trading insults with Peter, which gives us lots of lovely Grins of the Week:

Tracy: “I don’t want to upstage the bride.”

Liz: “I think you’ll be alright (!)”

Fiz: “Why would you care?”

Christian: “Because she – he’s my dad … mum. Delete as applicable.”

Eva: “I don’t think they’re suited.”

Jenna: “It’s a shame, if you ask me. Another one bites the dust.”

Eva: “Eh? He’s a good looking bloke, but I wouldn’t swap.”

Jenna: “I was talking about her.”

Tim: “I think you’re being a snob.”

Sally: “How am I being a snob for not wanting to travel in a van advertising drains?”

Jenna: “I don’t know why people get married these days.”

David: “Because they love each other (!)”

Beth: “Sal. Where’s Bali?”

Sally (clueless): ” … In the Southern Hemisphere.”

Beth: “Well, that’s pinned it down (!)”

Fiz: “What is he playing at?”

Ches: “No use asking me.”

Fiz: “Yeah, well, I know that.”

Peter: “You promised to love, honour and obey.”

Carla: “No, I didn’t. Not obey.”

Peter: “Ah, well, you do remember then?”

Carla: “I remember THAT.”

Tim (about Eva): “She put the ‘chest’ in Manchester.”

Sally: “Sophie just doesn’t like change.”

Tim: “She doesn’t like me.”

Dev: “It’s important to warm up the muscles.”

Sophie: “Yes, if you were sprinting. You’re doing a jog. That’s like a ‘warm up’.”

Dev: “A word of advice, Sophie: never, ever offer to coach anybody at anything – ever.”

PS

* Why wasn’t Tyrone at the wedding? It was a +1, so why was he not only not there, but his absence not even mentioned?*

* Sally was mortified to turn up in that van (why couldn’t he have just parked round the back or dropped her off?) but she’d have been even more distraught to learn that only a few miles away in Emmerdale, one of Rodney’s women had the exact-same one!

* How would Sally have known exactly what size suit Tim needed, and fancy paying £250 for one!*

* Beth’s prediction that the Barlow’s marriage wouldn’t last twelve months is bang-on!

* You could SO believe Audrey’s line about Gail: “She has got very difficult hair, actually,” couldn’t you?

* HOW cute were Christian’s children? When the little girl asked her brother if he wanted a chocolate milkshake and he (or someone!) squeaked, ‘Yeah’, it was both funny and beyond sweet, and had me reaching for the tissues. I’m such a cry-baby!

* I ran out of time last week so didn’t manage to write a ‘Carchelle Corner’ post. It’s not looking good for this week either, but I’ll get it done at some point. There’s SO much to discuss!

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