Queen Vic Corner – 23rd October 2011

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Kat & Alfie - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewI’m not quite sure where to start this week. I can’t believe Kat went up the Alley with that guy. It’s just not credible (even for Kat), after everything she and Alfie have been through over Tommy, and (just as I predicted last week), not five minutes later, Alfie’s chasing her up the stairs for a bit of Afternoon Delight. There we go. We’re all set for the next ‘Who’s the daddy?’ storyline.

I also can’t believe they’re off to Funchal. They’ve only just got back from one Holiday, so how can they afford it – both time and money-wise? They give most of their drinks away ‘On the ‘aahrse‘ as it is, and there’s Alfie offering Kim a free tab if she’d help Kat out while he went to the match. What Publican wouldn’t have already had their rota arranged so that they were fully staffed on a Saturday? It’s just not credible.

Mandy - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewTalking of staffing. Fatboy’s selling a car; sees Whitney, and just walks off to have lunch with her leaving the guy standing there. What kind of a salesman is that? It’s just not credible. Neither is what Mandy did to that car. Smashing the windscreen? Chucking a can of paint over it? Only a complete nutter would do that, but does Ian throw her out for good? No, he decides to MARRY her.

Ian & Mandy - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewMarry her? He should have her arrested. It’s just not credible. He then has a row with her in the chippy, and walks out and leaves a queue of customers stood there. That’s hardly good customer service, is it Ian?

Ok. Soaps have a bit of ‘poetic licence’, but the line between drama and reality is getting more and more blurred on EastEnders at the moment, and it’s seriously detracting from the show. There has to be a sense of realism or it’s … just not credible.

Whitney & Fats - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewWhitney being with Tyler, then suddenly walking straight out into the Square and kissing Fats instead (but there being no big ‘talk’ about it, and him apparently not sure whether they were ‘together’ or not). Not credible. I’ve wanted them to get together for ages, but where was the “I knew all along it was you Fats. Why didn’t you just tell me how you were feeling?” speech from Whit? Not credible.

Roxy not bothering with Amy. Raine, Cora, Abi and Oscar (remember him?) never being around, and suddenly there’s only Tanya and Lauren together in the house every night? Not credible. (It’s Term time. Why isn’t Abi there?) Was it credible that Greg would just walk out on Tanya? No. Not like that, it wasn’t.

Maybe they’re ‘between’ storylines? There’s some big stuff coming up (the return of Jane – THANK GOODNESS. I missed her. She and Tanya back acting together will be wonderful), so maybe this is just a blip? Let’s hope so …

Tanya & Lauren - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewThe best bit was (of course!), Tanya – and Lauren. They’re both struggling, and it’s only going to get worse. You can see the burden of fear and responsibility weighing heavy on Lauren’s young shoulders, but it’s a shame they’ve had to have her not only get drunk, but go off and sleep with Tyler as a ‘coping’ strategy. If she’s doing this now, what’s she going to be doing in a couple of weeks?

I hope they don’t make too much of this. Aaah. Just thought. At the exact second it’s all about to implode (with Lauren slumped drunk at the kitchen table, Tanya in agony on the sofa and Oscar making a guest appearance and just about to pull a boiling pan of soup off the cooker or swallow a load of Tanya’s pills), Max will walk in. Just a wild guess there (and I haven’t seen any spoilers, in case that IS virtually what happens)!

Yasmin - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewBen’s got a crush on Christian now then, has he? Unbelievably, Syed picked-up on it straight away. I’m surprised he noticed, as he’s been spent most of the week looking out of windows ‘Amira-spotting’. That baby’s made me smile. She’s so alert and really pays attention to what’s being said. (That’s not a good thing, mind. She’ll be in therapy before she’s five, having to listen to all all that angst and shouting at such a young age!). Bless.

Maybe Amira will stop Syed seeing Yasmin. He’ll be devastated at not having a child around any more, but Roxy will go on one drunken binge too far, forget she’s left Amy at nursery and decide to get on a plane (to Spain of course), then try to get out of the plane before they’ve brought the ladder up, bump her head, lose her memory and then Christian and Syed will be able to bring Amy up.

Think that’s not credible? It’s no more incredible than most of what we’ve seen over the last five days! It’s also incredible how many nominees there are for my Drinking from a empty mug Award this week. There’s Alfie (again), and Norman and Ian are also winners for taking a gulp but forgetting to swallow!

Not many (apart from the look on Janine’s face as she videoed Mandy’s bunny-boiler attack on Ian’s car), but here’s the Grins of the week:

Alfie (when Kat stuck her hand in his pocket): “What’re you doing you dirty mare? Not in front of the punters.”

Kim - EastEnders - Jane Reynolds' weekly 'Queen Vic Corner' reviewIan: “I’m happy as Larry – whoever Larry was.”

Kat: “How am I supposed to run this place on my own on a Saturday?”

Alfie: “Kim said she’d help out.”

Kim: “Did she rubbish.”

Alfie: “Shall we talk about your tab?”

Kim (excitedly): “Ready whenever you are.”

PS Ben told Christian, “We don’t really watch films at my house.” Er, it’s only last week he was watching Chicago with Shirley …

PPS Call me old, but much as I love Fatboy (his acting and his cheeky face), I hate all that ‘bling’ he wears. Makes him look stupid in my opinion (other opinions are available!).

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