TV Times 29th May 2011

The Apprentice

There’s often a clue at the beginning of the show as to who’ll end up beingThe Apprentice - This week's review in TV Times on Jane Reynolds' blog fired that week.  Usually it’s something like “I’m SirAlan’s Apprentice.  I’m going to win this for sure,” or “As soon as he said the task was about X, I knew I had to be PM because that’s my total area of expertise” etc.

This week, Ellie’s “I’m not a girlie girl,” (it was a fashion task), and “I wasn’t on form today,” looked like a portent of doom for her, but she was easily outdone by self-proclaimed ‘beauty guru’ Suzie with her “I’ve been selling skin care products for three years,” and her “I am in skincare, I sell it for a living, I know exactly what I’m doing.”  Yeah.

How many did she sell in the end, by the way? Hmmm … and talk about backtracking in the Boardroom?  “I didn’t say I could sell 60 products,” she wailed.  (She did.)  It’s lucky for her that they won, or she’d have been a gonner for sure this week.

Nick Hewer - The Apprentice - Jane Reynolds' review in this week's blogNeither team covered themselves in glory, did they? They’ve been swapped about so much now that I’ve almost forgotten which team is which, but SirAlan summed up Logic’s performance perfectly with: “Well Jim, welcome to Team Titanic.”  They were even branded “A shambles” by one of their own team, old Sportacus.  Thing is, it was ALL a bit of a bloody shambles really, wasn’t it?

Even Nick couldn’t help but break his normal vow of passive observer with a frustrated “I wouldn’t gas about it, I’d get on with it.”  Our Jim had a quiet week this week, so he did.  What about that young lad’s face when Jim popped out to give him his hot stone massage: priceless!

My favourite item for sale was the long-haired hamster – the ‘Winge’ – a clip-on wig/fringe.  Felicity tried to sell it to a woman. “It makes you look as if you’ve got a fringe. Actually, it might not work on you; you’ve kind-of already got a fringe.”  That’s impressive salesmanship, isn’t it?  She got fired.

The woman having the cold stone massage on her feet The Apprentice - This week's review on Jane Reynolds' blogseemed to get the best value for money by a country mile this week.  That immortal line “I’ll have what she’s having,” immediately sprang to mind!

PS Leon: don’t worry.  Someone putting a bit of mascara on you – or having to spray a man with fake tan – WON’T actually make you gay you know?  Bit of an over-reaction perhaps?  Discuss …

PPS In case you missed it last week, here’s Vincent’s double – it’s Sportacus from BBC TV’s top children’s programme Lazy Town!

It's Vincent from The Apprentice - Jane Reynolds TV Times






I’m almost up to date on Britain’s Next Big Thing with Theo Paphitis now.  Just the last episode to watch.  I’ve never worn a scarf in my life, but those scarves are so lovely I’d be almost tempted to buy one (if I had a spare £150 that is … which I don’t). It’s top of the list for tonight’s viewing (Sunday)!

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