TV Times – 20th November 2011

If you’re outside the UK, here’s a link to be able to watch UK TV programmes:

The X Factor

So, it was bye-bye Crate – sorry – Craig, this week then? Not before time. I’m sure he’s a lovely lad, but even if you shut your eyes and listen to him sing, there just isn’t anything special-enough about his voice to have got him to the final – despite Gary Barlow jumping up and down.

I really respected Gary at the beginning of this Series, but he’s coming across as increasingly spiteful and childish. It’s a bit embarrassing really, and I’m not sure I’d want to see him back. I did laugh when he said to Craig, “Anything you need; just give me a call.” I’ll bet that call goes straight to Voicemail …

I’m now hoping that Little Mix will win. I saw them on This Morning and thought how sweet and grounded they seemed. I guess that’ll change, but they seem to be quite good singers (when you can hear them above the over-loud backing tracks and the audience screaming), and I think it would make a pleasant change for a Group to win it. (The X Factor ITV1 Saturday/Sunday 8.15 pm)


MasterChef – The Professionals

I barely saw it this week, but just caught the last ten minutes of the Episode where Claire was dishing-up her meal to the Food Critics. Wow. I think from the comments she got that we can already say who this year’s Winner is, and from what I’d seen in the last couple of weeks, nobody else has even come close to her.

What an exciting new talent. I still haven’t got over Phil Vickery winning ‘Celebrity’ MasterChef a few weeks ago. His cooking was unbelievable, and you wouldn’t have known he wasn’t a professional too. In fact, he’s better than most of the chefs I’ve seen so far in this ‘Professional’ Series.

Sean Pertwee sounds as if he’s almost nodding off with indifference as he does the narration (I have visions of him reading the paper, or watching YouTube or something as he’s doing it!), but it’s STILL better than what we had before. Come on guys; can you sort the music out next please?

(MasterChef: The Professionals BBC 2 Monday-Friday various times)


Young Apprentice

Week 5: Deodorant; nice.

‘Raw’ sounded like meat, and the tube looked like (sorry!), a willy in the advert – all pink. At least they clearly showed the product in the ad though, unlike ‘Vanity’, which looked like something that had fallen out of a down-market Christmas Box Set.

‘Your scent can change, but you don’t have to,’ their voice-over said. In other words, ‘Even if you spray our stuff under your armpits, you’ll still be the same geeky person.’ Not quite the right message, perhaps? When the dancing girl sprayed it across the room I had a flashback of the ‘Shark-repellent Bat Spray’ from the original Batman film of 1966.

In their pitch, Lizzie patronised the Executives by saying that they didn’t understand what it was like to be a teenager. Er, we’ve all been there love.

Harry H delivered a cracking pitch – as ever – and there was never any question as to who was going to win this task. Gbemi was fired because she was responsible for the design. She’s a designer. That doesn’t bode well for the future, does it? (Young Apprentice Ep 3 BBC1 9.00 pm Mon)


Radio Times

Jeremy Vine’s Radio 2 Series Sounds of the 20th Century is on 1984 this week. It’s the best thing ever on the radio. (See TV Times 30th October for a full review).

(Sounds of the 20th Century Radio 2 10.00 pm every Thursday, and available on BBC iPlayer)


Don’t forget. If you like a laugh, listen to Going Out with Alan Carr on Radio 2. A perfect accompaniment to your Saturday evening dinner/going out preparations. He and Mad Mel Sykes are guaranteed to have you in stitches.

(Going Out with Alan Carr Radio 2 6.00-8.00 Saturdays)

And if you like Alan Carr, between 4.00-6.00 pm every Friday there’s a jewel of a show tucked-away on wee little Swindon 105.5 FM. It’s called The Big Weekender, and features Nick Anderson and Barry Harris – a sublime double act whose irreverant banter and sketches deserve a much larger audience.

Guests have no idea what they’re about to face in their interviews, and you truly wonder what on earth is coming next! Like all great double acts though, they know each other inside out, and that ‘Sixth Sense’ they both have for where the other is ‘going’ with something is what makes it so addictive.

Even something as mundane as the Swindon Evening Advertiser crossword or the weather forecast becomes comedy gold in their hands, and sketches like the ‘Balls Brothers, Mankini suppliers & launderers’ and the ‘Alabama Boys’ are a joy to listen to. Trust me, you’ll be hooked!

(The Big Weekender Swindon 105.5 FM – online if not in Swindon – 4.00-6.00 Fridays)

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